2008-03-17

St. Patrick's Day Is A Total Sham, But No One Really Cares


The good people at DoubleViking have set the record straight on the Irish and drinking:

FACT: Jesus, the ultimate lush, wasn’t Irish.

The guy took water -- the liquid necessary to sustain life -- and turned it into wine. What does that tell you about dependency issues? Jesus wasn’t Irish, he was a black Jew like Sammy Davis Jr. I wonder if he liked Newports?








Also, National Geographic sets the record straight about St. Patrick ridding Ireland of snakes - all lies!

As keeper of natural history at the National Museum of Ireland in Dublin, Nigel Monaghan has trawled through vast collections of fossil and other records of Irish animals. "At no time has there ever been any suggestion of snakes in Ireland, so [there was] nothing for St. Patrick to banish," Monaghan said.

Valentine's Day gets a lot of grief for being manufactured by the chocolate/card/flower companies, but St. Patrick's Day is obviously just a marketing ploy by the beer companies. They should just combine the two days, because what goes better than chocolate, beer and obligatory sex?

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