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Fark's Headlines of 2007.

Unfreakable

2008-01-01 12:03:18 PM

Monday 12/31 was Fark’s 2007 Headline of the Year contest. We also had our annual Headline of the Year contests for the main subtabs (Sports, Geek, Showbiz, and Politics). For those of you who missed those contests on Monday, they can be found here (all links pop):

Headline of the Year: http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=3298520

Headline of the Year – Sports: http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=3298282
Headline of the Year – Geek: http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=3298381
Headline of the Year – Showbiz: http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=3298324
Headline of the Year – Politics: http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=3298429
Headline of the Year – Wordplay/Puns: http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=3298760

Sadly, the voting is now closed, but you can still go back through those if you’d like a good laugh, and—if you missed them—which ones you’d have picked.

Now, based on your votes, here are the winners of Fark’s 2007 Headline of the Year contest:

Unfreakable

2008-01-02 12:03:39 AM

HEADLINE OF THE YEAR: Bear attack victim had 'tender heart,' according to friends, family, bear
(submitter: jclark666 )

Runner-up: Man who beat his girlfriend with a flashlight charged with assault. Flashlight charged with battery
(submitter: Mr. Xhin )


SPORTS HEADLINE OF THE YEAR: Kentucky Derby winner Barbaro downgraded from Spalding to Elmer's
(submitter: ProfessorTomoe )

Runner-up: Skiing champion killed after sudden encounter with a tree, the great white shark of the ski slopes
(submitter: rodeofrog )


GEEK HEADLINE OF THE YEAR: Scientists develop an adhesive so powerful it could stick a criminal charge on a rich white guy
(submitter: vossiewulf )

Runner-up: Today may or may not be Erwin Shrödinger's birthday
(submitter: dedekind_cut )


SHOWBIZ HEADLINE OF THE YEAR: CSI team currently at Anna Nicole Smith residence in the Bahamas. After turning on special light that illuminates semen, the house could be seen from space
(submitter: veedeevadeevoodee )

Runner-up: Congratulations to Larry Birkhead, winner of the 2007 Anna Nicole Smith Vaginal Dumpster Invitational
(submitter: icallhimgamblor )


WORDPLAY/PUN HEADLINE OF THE YEAR: Mom wants schools to ban books filled with sin. There goes my trigonometry textbook
(submitter: Captain Ford Prefect )

Runner-up: Bingo hall worker B-10 and robbed
(submitter: 40below )


Congratulations and kudos to the winners!

Unfreakable

2008-01-02 12:32:00 AM

Gah, how did I miss Politics???

POLITICS HEADLINE OF THE YEAR: Barack Obama campaigned door-to-door in Iowa on Saturday. In other news, Des Moines police report that they have received a large number of calls from frightened residents claiming there is a black man standing on their porch

(submitter: Killer Miller )

Runner-up: Japanese lesbian begins run for parliament purple monkey dishwasher I once killed a man. Let's face it, you stopped reading this headline after the first two words
(submitter: Smiths )

Kudos to these guys, too.